How to Heal a Relationship After a Fight
Handling Hurt and Painful Feelings in a Relationship (Video)
Fighting with your partner hurts so much!
It’s so hard to handle all the hurt and pain that comes after arguing with your spouse or partner. How do you fix a relationship when bringing things up causes another fight? Emotions seem to be part of the problem. But if you can speak from your deeper feelings under the issue, your emotions can also fuel healing.
You love your spouse, your partner. And you want to get past the issue and feel warm and close together again.
Why Are Relationship Problems So Painful?
Relationship problems trigger an intense kind of upset. You want to talk with your partner without getting angry. This is essential to your sense of safety. That’s because humans need to seek out secure, deep attachment with each other. It’s our nature.
We rely on each other for protection, companionship, and love. When something happens to disrupt the good feelings we have together, we feel threatened, both emotionally and on a basic physical level. … Come Read the Rest
Want to Stop Arguing? Why Kindness is the Key
“It feels like we have the same arguments over and over again.”
“I know deep down that I love him, but too often, I just don’t feel it.”
“Why does it take so little to set her off? I barely walked in the door before she started in on me again!”
“Why can’t we solve anything? We can’t stop fighting.”
Couples can love one another very much and still struggle to connect. They can be extremely committed to their relationship. But for some, minor spats keep turning into big arguments.
We see many couples who struggle to communicate. Why do disagreements get worse the more you try to talk?
You might be thinking: “There are so many things to like about him. But for some reason, I just can’t satisfy him.” Or: “She doesn’t see that I’m trying very hard to make her happy.” The paradox is, both partners are unhappy, both want to fix it, and neither seems to know what to do.
Most People Aren’t Selfish Jerks; The Danger is a Habit of… Come Read the Rest
10 Healthy Ways Partners Fight Fair
10 Warnings Signs that Arguing is Hurting Your Relationship and What to Do About It
As we grow up, each of us learns that there are many ways to approach an argument. We can fight — persist, badger and raise the volume — until we get our way. We can try to avoid it entirely by giving in, or keeping mute about issues. Some couples may find themselves stuck in a pattern of ‘fighting all the time.’ When arguing doesn’t solve anything, withdrawal can set in — a habit of turning away from each other for self-preservation.
It is sad when couples see their partner as someone to avoid, someone to change or someone who is on the ‘other side.’ But there is real reason to believe couples can shift from opposition to kindler gentler problem solving that has powerful positive outcomes. Deep down, each of you most likely wants to help each other reach your goals, individually and as a couple. Arguing successfully helps you both find solutions — and be happier together — … Come Read the Rest
5 Love-Saving Tips When Arguing With Your Partner
Arguing with your partner can really hurt.
Handled one way, it can cause pain and injury. But handled another, something beautiful and tender may unfold. It depends on how you go about arguing with your partner.
When an important issue raises your different views on any matter — money, parenting, sex, work, life — it is natural to feel angry, upset, maybe even chilled to the bone. Arguing with your partner may not necessarily damage your love – it depends on what you do with them.
Partners who love each other can still feel negative and critical thoughts toward each other sometimes. Those who are able to work around the negativity can find their way back to happiness together. Others get stuck in a downward spiral, where nothing gets solved and animosity grows.
Is the Problem Your Partner, Or Your Pattern?
Gridlocked couples fight differently than happier couples do. Struggling couples often misunderstand the reason for their growing (and unwanted) hostility: They think the issue is the kind of person their partner is. More likely, … Come Read the Rest